Tag Archives: satire

Charlie Brooker: How to fix the missing British summer – and other irritations | Comment is free | The Guardian

On and on it goes. It’s got to the point where pulling back the curtains each morning feels like waking up in jail. No, worse: like waking up inside a monochrome Czechoslovakian cartoon about waking up in jail. The outdoor world is illuminated by a weak, grey, diseased form of light that has fatally exhausted itself crawling through the gloomy stratospheric miasma before perishing feebly on your retinas. Everything is a water feature. We’re on the Planet of the Snails. Cameron’s Britain.

It’s quite rare for one of Mr Brooker’s columns to elicit a full on chuckle from me, but this passage certainly did.

How did The Coalition, a political satire so preposterous it’s beyond parody, ever get commissioned?

Parliament returns next week. Season Two of The Coalition, the best political satire currently on TV. Most of it is scripted. Yet it has a very “real”, improvised feel. You almost believe these preposterous characters could theoretically exist.

A prime minister as sleek as a human aubergine, tetchily returning from holiday after holiday to rail against a “culture of entitlement”. This is the bloke, remember, who promised an end to Punch and Judy politics.

Does Cameron ever watch playbacks of Prime Minister’s Questions? The whole nation is subconsciously expecting a backbench question from a crocodile, or a string of sausages. Although a string of sausages actually has more spine than government backbenchers.

And Clegg. Clegg. A deputy prime minister so pompous and irrelevant he might as well be a Twitter account. Putting the word “sigh” in asterisks. Blaming his lack of followers on the haterz and the cynicz.

Has a cast of extras ever been so cruelly treated as the Lib Dems? Once-optimistic party members – students, psych-folk fans, chiropractors and so on – now hold the coats while their Bullingdon scuttler overlords kick the welfare state to death, steal all its money and glide away, cackling, on monogrammed Segways to play whiff-whaff. What’s for supper, Gids? “Panda tartare and some very expensive Colombian dessert …”

Ian Martin (Comment is free, The Guardian) gives me a rare early morning laugh.

These cuts don’t go far enough – it’s time we taxed Colin Firth’s Bafta | AL Kennedy | Comment is free | The Observer

We may have safeguarded some trees and be fighting library closures, but there are so many other areas of vulnerability left open, so many other pleasures that can be redefined in terms of monetary value and tax revenue. Every day, voters arrogantly use doorknobs without paying any kind of fee. Conversations are thoughtlessly carried on using copyrighted brand names, privately generated phrases and words that could and should be registered properly with clearly defined owners who can benefit from their regulated exploitation.

I will continue to hum, whistle and put my hands in my trouser pockets. Rebel, that’s me.